I’ve not written about my #100daysofhappiness since Day 56. I’m now on the home straight of the 100 days (today is day 94) so thought now would be a good time to break my silence on the happy days.
There’s lots of happy days to update you on…Life has been pretty full on over the last month so I’ve not been blogging BUT today I come to you from a very happy place! Not literally, I’m in my kitchen… but just generally. First, an update on my happy days…..
Day 43 – Had a visit at work from a lovely friend
Day 44 – An evening of lols last night with my girls to celebrate Miss Laurian’s birthday
Day 45 – Little visit to see my faves today even if I wasn’t the usual fun Auntie Katie due to a LOT of booze last night
Day 46 – Went upside down with no hands at pole tonight! Whoop!
Day 47 – Lovely catch up with friends and their kiddies
Day 48 – Free Boost because my name came up in their social media campaign, lovely catch up with Trottski and came home to a really lovely card from my Auntie Susan
Day 49 – This time next week I’ll be packing my bags to head off to Liverpool! Excited!!
Day 50 – Worked with a lovely group of young girls today. Giving back to the local community makes you feel good!
Day 51 – felt good to get back out on an outdoor run
Day 52 – had a lovely evening with some lovely ladies
Day 53 – Just finished a pretty awesome cake and went upside down with no hands again tonight
Day 54 – PANCAKES
Day 55 – packed my case ready for my weekend in Liverpool!
Day 56 – Found this forgotten photo from Thailand
This doesn’t take us to today (I am on Day 77) but I’ll post the rest of the days later.
Now, I want to say, I dread to think how I would have been feeling over these 77 days if I hadn’t embarked on #100daysofhappiness. It’s been tough but I’ve found that forcing myself to see the positives each day has really helped and I was beginning to feel loads better about life.
Then, out of the blue I got a text from Mr Not So Perfect to ask how I was. I had ALL the intentions of not replying but then 3 days later I got drunk. So at 4am, I stumbled through the front door and had the genius idea of responding. Good one Katie. It resulted in a bit of back and forth, no niceties from my side and obviously, the next day fear set in and I knew I had made a big mistake. When he then text again a few days later fishing for me to tell him I still cared for him, I told him to never contact me again and he agreed he wouldn’t. I was really proud of myself. But I regressed and suddenly went back to feeling the same way I did in the days after I found out the truth and it was really horrible.
BUT slowly over this last month I have been trying to put things into perspective. I’ve been through worse in life, I really have. It’s not something to talk about here but the love and strength my family and I had got us all here today so I thought, if I got through that, I can get through this. And it got me thinking, I have been devastated, sad and heartbroken over this numpty whilst other people in my life have been dealing with much bigger challenges, battles and heartbreak, suffering much more pain, worry and sadness than I have had to deal with in the last few months. I’ve just been too self-absorbed to think about it before.
Someone asked me this week if I’m happy being single and truthfully, I said I am. I am getting to know me and what I want in life. I love my life, I enjoy living it the way I do and it’s going to take someone special to become a part of it.
Something has worked though… Mr Not So Perfect stuck by his word for almost a month. Until earlier this week. He contacted me to again say he is sorry, he still thinks of me and that I will always be in his thoughts. I’ve not replied. I’ve actually found it laughable and it’s made me more determined than ever to keep smiling.
Lots of Love